IBQ ~ Confidence

When I tell people, even my closest friends, that I am actually shy, introverted, and lack confidence they roll their eyes at me. But it’s true. The persona they see is all an act; albeit a good one.

I live by the stream of thought that to succeed in something or be something you want but can’t imagine obtaining, you should do just that, imagine. Fake it till you make it.

First you picture yourself in your mind’s eye as a confident and self-assured. Next hold your head up and go convince the world! Finally do like I do; run home, flop down on the sofa and let out a huge sigh each and every time you get away with it.

I first discovered this way of thinking in junior high school but I really perfected it in high school. When it came time to give an oral report to a class room full of kids who were judging my mannerisms, my tone of voice, my stance, and my wardrobe I needed something to get me through it so I pretended.

Growing up with my sister I pretended a lot. I pretended to be a mommy, pretended to cook, pretended with our Barbie’s and in the summer under the influence of re-runs of the old Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney movies pretended to “put on a show!”

I already had the arsenal I needed to give an oral report, if it was necessary. All I had to do was pretend I wasn’t scared. I saw other girls succumb to their shyness, refuse and fail. That was not an option.

I have no idea if this is true or not I am only guessing but I can’t imagine they make young adults give oral reports in schools today. In this politically correct world we live in it is probably frowned upon for fear of traumatizing the student. But I can’t help but wonder what I might be like today if I never taught myself to pretend to be confident and brave.

Confident Seagull(w)

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9 thoughts on “IBQ ~ Confidence”

  2. There’s an old Kurt Vonnegut quote, I think it was from “Mother Night” where he says “We are what we pretend to be, so be careful what you pretend” – in his story the actions had been done for ill, I like that you used the method to improve and do better.

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  4. On the contrary, high school kids ( I have had three of them go through high school in the last eight years) still have to do oral presentations. And loads of them. It seems to be a thing these days. I guess it is preparation for the real world. I concur with your thoughts of putting on a face, and attitude when doing oral presentations, it does help fool the embarassment/self-consiciousness centre of the brain from filling one’s thoughts. The fear of public speaking is still the No. 1 fear, so there must be loads of others who are shy/introverted/self-conscious.

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