I Am My Sole Soul Mate

Word Press asks us this week if we believe we have a soul mate. I am 55 and single. I have two divorces and a broken engagement under my belt so, probably no. I’ve quit looking; actively looking that is. There are too many other things I would rather be doing.

I read recently that people who are content being single (like me) are people who avoid conflict, (like me?). Hmmmm…

I used to do the online dating thing. I had many first and second dates and even a few short-term relationships. I have a couple of guys from those years that I consider friends to this day.

In 2009 my profile looked something like this:

I enjoy a man who is well-kept. T-shirts and jeans are fine but I like him to know when to wear a shirt with a collar.

I enjoy a man who is well-kept. T-shirts and jeans are fine but I like him to know when to wear a shirt with a collar.

This bit of my profile (there was so much more) was picked up by one man in particular. I had never heard from this “gentleman” before but he wrote to ask me what right did I have seeking such a man given how fat I was (Ha! He should see me now!). These sort of emails were common place and I expect little has changed. I’m not interested.

I wrote last year about the kind of man I would be attracted to in my letter: Dear Future Husband I haven’t found him yet. But in my own way I am still looking.

My way of looking is to go ahead and live my life. I plan to go to the places I want to visit and do the things I enjoy. My pie in the sky is to find a man doing the same. The good thing is that if it never happens I am okay with that.

During the summer I spent a wonderful day doing the things I love to do and going to the places I love to go to. The weather was gorgeous and I was in my element. Read about it here.

I was taking pictures at Afton Vineyards when a man behind me said “What is that…a camera?” It took me a moment to get the joke. I said “Why yes, do you remember these things? It’s what people used to take pictures before cell phones. It works like this” and I snapped his picture.

It was a fun flirty moment, the kind I love.


..and then his wife came back from the ladies room…

16 thoughts on “I Am My Sole Soul Mate

  1. It’s easy for someone like me (who has found his soul mate) to say, but nonetheless I believe it: Our happiness / identity is not dependent upon the presence of others in our lives; nor is their absence an impediment to our fulfillment.

    PS: the “fat” comment guy should be subjected to the same level of disdain as he displayed toward you. Still, I remain compassionate: It must be difficult to be so brainless, shallow, and insensitive.


  2. Funny, I just had this discussion with someone I know in an email. He asked if I found anyone yet because of my move. I’ve told him so many times I have NO interest in finding anyone but he refuses to believe me. It borders on annoying that he keeps asking me this question. Most everyone else I know have finally stopped asking me. I told him that I can’t even picture myself with a man anymore–I can’t conjure up the image of the man I would be with like I used to be able to do. I’m happy too: me and my dog. I’m hoping here that I can find joy and love with my Mom and find a job that brings me satisfaction! ❤


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