I Am My Sole Soul Mate

Word Press asks us this week if we believe we have a soul mate. I am 55 and single. I have two divorces and a broken engagement under my belt so, probably no. I’ve quit looking; actively looking that is. There are too many other things I would rather be doing.

I read recently that people who are content being single (like me) are people who avoid conflict, (like me?). Hmmmm…

I used to do the online dating thing. I had many first and second dates and even a few short-term relationships. I have a couple of guys from those years that I consider friends to this day.

In 2009 my profile looked something like this:

I enjoy a man who is well-kept. T-shirts and jeans are fine but I like him to know when to wear a shirt with a collar.

I enjoy a man who is well-kept. T-shirts and jeans are fine but I like him to know when to wear a shirt with a collar.

This bit of my profile (there was so much more) was picked up by one man in particular. I had never heard from this “gentleman” before but he wrote to ask me what right did I have seeking such a man given how fat I was (Ha! He should see me now!). These sort of emails were common place and I expect little has changed. I’m not interested.

I wrote last year about the kind of man I would be attracted to in my letter: Dear Future Husband I haven’t found him yet. But in my own way I am still looking.

My way of looking is to go ahead and live my life. I plan to go to the places I want to visit and do the things I enjoy. My pie in the sky is to find a man doing the same. The good thing is that if it never happens I am okay with that.

During the summer I spent a wonderful day doing the things I love to do and going to the places I love to go to. The weather was gorgeous and I was in my element. Read about it here.

I was taking pictures at Afton Vineyards when a man behind me said “What is that…a camera?” It took me a moment to get the joke. I said “Why yes, do you remember these things? It’s what people used to take pictures before cell phones. It works like this” and I snapped his picture.

It was a fun flirty moment, the kind I love.

IMG_5394

..and then his wife came back from the ladies room…

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16 thoughts on “I Am My Sole Soul Mate

  1. It’s easy for someone like me (who has found his soul mate) to say, but nonetheless I believe it: Our happiness / identity is not dependent upon the presence of others in our lives; nor is their absence an impediment to our fulfillment.

    PS: the “fat” comment guy should be subjected to the same level of disdain as he displayed toward you. Still, I remain compassionate: It must be difficult to be so brainless, shallow, and insensitive.

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  2. Funny, I just had this discussion with someone I know in an email. He asked if I found anyone yet because of my move. I’ve told him so many times I have NO interest in finding anyone but he refuses to believe me. It borders on annoying that he keeps asking me this question. Most everyone else I know have finally stopped asking me. I told him that I can’t even picture myself with a man anymore–I can’t conjure up the image of the man I would be with like I used to be able to do. I’m happy too: me and my dog. I’m hoping here that I can find joy and love with my Mom and find a job that brings me satisfaction! ❤

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